April Fools: Caspy's Dream Day Part 1

It all started on April 1^st. It was Edmund’s fault really (though he blamed Prince Corin). Edmund had proceeded to dye Peter’s hair green which induced a war of pranks between the brothers. However, this story follows one particular prank that the Gentle Queen pulled on two of her unwanted suitors, Prince Rabadash of Calormen and Caspy the Fake.

On the twenty-third of March, Rabadash and Caspy both received nearly identical letters from Cair Paravel.

Dear Suitor,

Your request to woo Queen Susan the Gentle has been accepted. Please report to Cair Paravel on April 1^st for your only chance. Those who fail shall be banished from the Queen’s sight forever.

Sincerely, High King Peter the Magnificent, Emperor of the Lone Islands and Lord of Cair Paravel, Knight of the Most Noble Order of the Lion

Caspy could hardly contain his excitement as he readied himself to depart. He knew, he just knew that he would win Susan’s heart. Before long, Caspy stood outside the massive gates of Cair Paravel. He timidly knocked.

“State your business!” barked a guard.

“I-I’m here to woo Queen Susan,” Caspy stammered.

“Woo Queen Susan, eh?” the guard laughed. “Don’t get your hopes up. Every man who comes to woo her leaves with a broken heart. And a broken bone or two.”

Caspy was not disturbed by this and answered, “But I am her true love. She will not turn me down!”

The guard simply shrugged and opened a smaller door cut into the large gate. Caspy entered and listened as the guard gave him directions to the office of King Peter where he was to report. Wandering up the driveway, Caspy thought he caught a glimpse of a figure watching him from the window; a slim figure, no doubt belonging to Queen Susan’s elusive and mysterious brother, King Edmund. Caspy tossed his head back, trying to seem confident and he stepped up to the door. He knocked and several minutes elapsed before a nervous-looking faun opened it.

“Hello, I am Caspy the Fake,” Caspy announced before the faun could say anything. “Can I see King Peter?”

“I don’t know,” the faun answered. “Can you?”

Caspy groaned. “May I see King Peter?”

“Right this way.” The Faun led him through the grand entry way and guided him down several halls. They halted in front of a door. “Please have a seat inside. King Peter will be with you shortly.” He pushed open the door and Caspy stepped inside. As his eyes adjusted to the light, Caspy noticed that he was not alone.

At the far end of the room another man slouched in a chair, his feet propped up on a low stool displaying his fine pointy-toed shoes. The man glanced up at him and Caspy’s eyes widened in astonishment.

“What are you doing here?” both shouted simultaneously. “Going to propose to Queen Susan. No, I’m going to propose to her.”

“B-but Rab!” Caspy protested. “She’s mine!”

“Don’t you pay any attention to canon?” Rabadash scoffed. “Your romance never existed, lover boy! On the other hand, Susan and I go waaaaaaaay back.”

“Oh yah!” Caspy shouted. “She refused you in the end!”

Rabadash set his feet on the floor. “That was only because of her brother! But this-this time I have the High King’s permission!”

“Well so do I,” Caspy remarked.

“Yah right,” Rabadash scoffed. Caspy produced the letter and showed it to him. Rabadash frowned, then shrugged and resumed his former position. Several minutes later, the doors opened and the faun returned.

“King Peter will see you now, Prince Rabadash,” he announced.

Rabadash rose to his feet and smirked at Caspy. “See you later, loser.”

Caspy ignored him and continued to wait for his turn. The minutes dragged by and Caspy wandered towards the little window in the western wall. It was too high for him to see out of so he dragged a chair over. Climbing up, he peered through the cloudy glass and discovered a little garden. The sweet melody of a woman singing drifted up towards him and felt himself slip into daydreams of his future life with Susan. Ah, if only. Then the visions crashed into darkness as his foot slipped and he fell to the floor. Head spinning, Caspy tried to stand up but decided to stay on the floor. This was the same position the faun found him in when he returned.

“Er, em, sir, pick yourself up,” he instructed. “The High King shall see you now, if you can make yourself presentable.” He glared distastefully at Caspy and muttered under his breath, “I dearly hope the Queen rejects him. If she doesn’t, I shall very well leave the country.”

What awaited Caspy in the next room quite startled him. Sitting behind the desk was not the dangerous dictator Caspy had imagined King Peter to be. Instead, he saw an honest young man, hands folded, waiting for him to make an account of himself.

“You do have a voice, don’t you?” Peter inquired.

Caspy tried to find his. “Uh, uh, yes, uh, your majesty.”

“Good,” Peter agreed, rising to his feet. “And your name is?”

“Caspy the Fake,” he replied.

Peter raised an eyebrow. “I have heard of you.”

“You have?” Caspy gasped. Perhaps King Peter was a fan of Greasy-Haired Prince, or maybe… He didn’t dare hope that Susan had put in a good word for him.

Peter continued. “You are a distant cousin of Caspian the Seafarer, are you not?” Caspy nodded. “Good, good.” Peter rubbed his hands together, but somehow Caspy found that this wasn’t an unpleasant gesture. “You have journeyed to seek the hand of my sister.” He stopped. “This is why you are here, correct?”

“Uh, yes,” Caspy replied. He certainly wasn’t here just to be intimidated by the High King!

“Well, my sister is currently occupied with another suitor,” Peter explained. “But as soon as she rejects him, you will be allowed to see her. If she will see you,” he added. “You will be shown to your room where you may freshen up. But please, do not harass the creatures you see in the halls, and do not try to speak to Queen Susan, unless she speaks to you.”

Caspy agreed to these terms and soon found himself standing in a spacious room completely decorated with the color pink, much to his satisfaction.

~